'Twas in Need of an Expression (Free Verse) 7/9/15

Am I supposed to feel sorry for 
Someone who put themselves in a predicament?
Heck no! Why do I feel so terrible?
I'm glad you asked. 
I am sad, confused, and most of all hurt. 
Yep, it's that serious.
I don't sign up for the things I go through. 
They just happen. 
Yes, some things can be avoided, 
But not what I'm referring to.
I'm a person with feelings, 
But others seem to ignore that. 
Most see me as the happy-go-lucky type 
Or the sarcastic type.
It's a facade due to the fact that
I hate expressing my feelings and explaining myself.
No one understands me, 
And I don't expect them to.
It's really hard to understand 
Someone who is as private as I.
I don't really open up,
Afraid that it may come back to me,
And I'd know exactly who to blame.
I'm not a well-known person,
Often standing in the shadows 
Fearing being seen. 
But who could blame me?
Not you or you or the next person.
But I've realized that fear holds us back,
It keeps us from moving on.
And I don't want it to hold me up any longer.
I can't sit around and watch the sun rise, 
And sit inside all because of the fear of sweating.
That's insane!
Expressing myself is what I want to do,
But it's hard when fear is around. 
But I now realize that people will talk
Even if I was mute.
That's just life.
Thanks for bearing with me, 
And allowing to express myself freely,
The way I always wanted to.

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